Comments Posted By Phalini devi dasi
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Yogesvara: Here’s a problem. The women today want the same rights as men. How can they be satisfied?
Prabhupada: Everything will be satisfied. Just like our women, Krsna conscious, they are working. They don’t want equal rights with men. It is due to Krsna consciousness. They are cleansing the temple, they are cooking very nicely. They are satisfied. They never say that “I have to go to Japan for preaching like Prabhupada.” They never say. This is artificial. So Krsna consciousness means work in his constitutional position. The women, men, when they remain in their constitutional position, there will be no artificial (indistinct) (loud traffic noises). (Morning walk, Rome, 05/27/74)
Srila Prabhupada didn’t want us to adopt American ways of life. After a Bhagavad-gita lecture Srila Prabhupada was asked if he was in this world. He replied, “Just like I am in America. It is very easy to understand. I am not adopting any ways of life as the Americans. So I am not in America. Not only myself, all my disciples who are following me, they are also not Americans. They’re different from American behavior, American ways of life. In that sense I’m not in America. I am in Vrndavana because wherever I go, in my apartment or in my temple, I live with Krsna and Krsna consciousness. I don’t accept any consciousness of America. And I teach my disciples also to take to that consciousness. So one who takes to that consciousness, he is also not in America, not in this world.” (Lecture, Los Angeles, 12/16/68)
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Nov 25, 2013 @ 6:21 pm
Dear Devakiji, Your article makes perfect sense. Srila Prabhupada put his male disciples, not female disciples, in leadership positions in ISKCON for a reason, because their intelligence is not so easily blurred by emotions like that of a woman. Srila Prabhupada saw everyone who came to render service to the preaching mission–both male and female–as sent by his Guru Maharaja. He therefore accepted and appreciated all of us and our contributions equally. He saw all of us as equals, as spirit souls, but he didn’t engage us all equally. We female-bodied disciples were genuinely appreciated, respected and encouraged to render devotional service along with our Godbrothers. In many services and situations, gender differences were not considered at all. But in some cases, they were. Leadership functions and positions such as the role of ritvik priest (eleven were chosen by Srila Prabhupada to initiate, chant on beads, and name the new devotees on behalf of Srila Prabhupada–1977 only), membership on the GBC, the position of Temple president and Vice President, certain priestly activities such as performing fire sacrifices, the sannyasa ashram, etc., were all exclusively carried out by and bestowed upon devotees in male bodies. This was not simply coincidental. Srila Prabhupada intentionally arranged ISKCON’s leadership in this way, which clearly reflected his personal recognition of the different natures Lord Krishna chose to endow the male and female with.
Srila Prabhupada is the Founder/Acarya of the International Society for Krishna Consciousness. Acarya means “one who teaches by his own example.” All of us who were blessed to be present during Srila Prabhupada’s personal presence were taught by his actions that his male-bodied disciples were to lead the movement, as has been pointed out above. Aligned with his actions we also have an overwhelming majority of his statements that support his vision of male leadership: “Prakrti means energy, just like prakrti means woman, naturally a woman is under the control of the man. That is our Vedic system, and natural system also. However the woman may claim equal rights, they are under the control of the man. That is natural.” (Lecture, Bombay, 12/17/75)
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Nov 25, 2013 @ 6:19 pm
@#34: Dear Mohana Mohini Mataji, Thank you for your encouraging comment, and for your good point about practicing femininity vs trying to step into men’s roles, which, as you described so aptly, is a “lose-lose” situation. All glories to Srila Prabhupada who mercifully taught us women the principles of how to cultivate and maintain femininity, and who bravely and boldly preached that although all souls are equal, men’s duties and women’s duties are different.
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Dec 21, 2012 @ 8:50 pm
Kudos to you, Mother Devaki, for developing and implementing a course for ladies to help us understand our roles in Vedic culture. WOO-HOO! What a welcome and phenomenal idea! Thank you and congratulations! This kind of education is so sorely needed in ISKCON–my hat’s off to you for taking the initiative. Put me on the roster. Your grateful servant, –Phalini dd
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Sep 9, 2012 @ 1:49 am
Dear Devotees of Bhubaneshvar-Dhama, Pranams. All glories to Srila Prabhupada. All glories to Sri Sri Krsna-Balarama! It is just past midnight here in North Carolina, USA, on the night of Lord Sri Krsna’s Appearance, and I have just now read your letter. This is a very sad report from your temple. We are feeling very, very sad that this has happened. I have heard that the more sincere we become, the more severely we may be tested. Somehow, because you are all so sincere, Our Lord has deemed fit to test you in this most challenging way. We are confident that from this calamity will come some great blessing, though, so please, please, don’t despair. Expect something wonderful to come from this horrible deed that those little Kali-yuga demons have perpetrated. Thank you for the wonderful service you all do there in Bhubaneshvar. We are praying for you as you have asked. Hare Krsna.
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Aug 10, 2012 @ 5:25 am
Nice article about free will, Vrindavanlila. Thanks. Cool how you presented different questions–“problems”–then offered quotes from Srila Prabhupada to help illustrate the solutions. I really like your conclusion, how Varnasrama dharma is the perfectly designed arrangement of the Lord to allow us to act within our own nature, varna and guna to become purified. Great point that it’s our own free will whether we choose to live according to varnasrama dharma or not.
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Jul 3, 2012 @ 2:48 pm
Bhadram te! Are you the Amala Prema from Poland? So nice to hear from you on Dandavats! Thank you for writing this informative article about Sri Yamuna Maharani. I had no idea that Srimati Yamuna devi is so polluted! I will pray to Lord Jagannatha for her. She is very dear to Lord Jagannatha, and Lord Jagannatha hears our prayers. I will keep her in my prayers and kirtans. Hare Krsna.
Always wishing you and your family well,
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Jun 26, 2012 @ 11:22 pm
Great article! Thank you, Mother Vrndavanlila! Excellent overview of the necessity of celibacy and chastity and how they complement each other. A friend forwarded the link to me a while back, but I was too busy until today to read your article. I finally got a chance to read it just now, and it was well worth the wait. May I have your permission to quote you? I always appreciate works which support Srila Prabhupada’s desire to see Daiva Varnasrama Dharma to be reestablished in the world.
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Dec 31, 2011 @ 9:15 pm
Thank you to all the devotees who commented after my story. I agree with you, Ananda, that the tractor is not a good idea. We wanted to dig the grave with shovels. I asked everyone in the community to come help dig. No one could come except Mitra. I thought about digging it myself, but due to the fact that I am in a 61-year-old, weak, arthritic body and it was raining off and on, and there was no one except my daughter and my baby grandson to help me and we had to call the telephone company and the power company and make an appointment to have the guys come out three days later to mark the ground above where the underground power lines are so that we wouldn’t hit them with the shovels, and we were afraid to wait any longer to bury her, we had to make a decision. So, since Mitra was the only person who responded to my request, and he was willing to dig the grave in two hours by himself (it would have taken me two DAYS), we accepted his kind proposal. Sometimes ya just gotta do what ya gotta do, especially when the buzzards are already circling overhead…
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Dec 31, 2011 @ 1:30 am
Thank you so much for this little report including the wonderfully inspiring letters you have received from so many inmates. Thank you also for your work over the years with prisoners. You’re awesome. Because of you, I looked for the first time (I am embarrassed to admit) at the IPM website. While there, I read a great story by Akhilananda Prabhu about one Bhakta Aaron who got initiated WHILE STILL IN PRISON by HH Bhaktimarga Swami. What a cool story! All glories to Akhilananda Prabhu and to all you devotees who are rendering such important service to Srila Prabhupada and Their Lordships Sri Sri Guru and Gauranga!
Your admiring sister,
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Sep 27, 2011 @ 5:48 am
Correction regarding Comment # 13:
Please excuse me. I posted the wrong URL for Mother Narada Priya’s blog.
Here’s the correct address:
Sorry for the mistake.
Your aspiring servant,
Phalini devi dasi
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Apr 15, 2011 @ 2:00 am
Namonamaha. Hare Krsna. All glories to Srila Prabhupada.
Thank you for all your comments. Mother Narada Priya has asked me to explain to all of you that she did not post this article here and she does not know who did. Because she did not post her article here, she will not be responding to comments here. If you would like to make a comment about this article, kindly go to her blog firstname.lastname@example.org and contact her through her email which is posted there. She has posted a response to Sita-Rama Prabhu’s comments there (it’s currently on the front page).
Phalini devi dasi
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Apr 14, 2011 @ 1:21 am
Awesome lecture, Raj Prabhu. Thank you so much. You have always been the embodiment of enthusiasm. Haven’t seen you in many years, but I can tell from the super-fired-up tone of your talk that you haven’t changed a bit. –Mata Phalini
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Mar 20, 2011 @ 2:41 am
Dear Nirmala devi, Namonamaha. All glories to Srila Prabhupada and his dedicated followers. Thank you for posting this beautiful eulogy about Bhadra Priya Mataji. I never knew her, but I am grateful to learn about her from you. Your Godsister, Phalini dd
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Mar 7, 2011 @ 5:01 pm
Thank you, Guruseva Mataji, for submitting this heartfelt letter to your dear husband so that we could all read it. I am grateful for the sobering effect that your words have on my heart. I hope to always remember and never forget this story. Perhaps one day I will be blessed to obtain your holy association. Your aspiring servant, Phalini devi dasi
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Mar 26, 2010 @ 11:49 pm
Nice class, Urmila. I especially like the part where you said that we can pray for courage to surrender to purification, and that maybe it will hurt, sometimes it hurts, that Prabhupada said it is a hard struggle [that requires] determination. Well said. Thanks. –Phalini
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Feb 25, 2010 @ 11:37 pm
Although I understand your motive in citing the Ramayana and Bhagavad-gita as examples of “myths,” I object to your use of the term “myth” in connection with these two works. They are not myths, nor should we allow anyone, including ourselves, to read or use the term “myth” in connection with the epic histories Mahabharata and Ramayana.
That said, I agree with you that the absorption of these wonderful epics in their ears and hearts has deeply ingrained in the people of India a strong sense of duty and propriety, which cannot be said for the Romeo and Juliet story.
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Feb 4, 2010 @ 6:36 pm
Thank you, Mataji, for sharing your thoughts and realizations about chanting. Very nice. Hare Krsna.
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Jan 25, 2010 @ 1:37 am
Thank you, Omkara Mataji, for taking care of our Godbrothers and Godsisters when they are getting close to death.
Rasajna and I got initiated together in L.A. She is very dear to my heart, and I am grateful to you for letting us know about her illness. I will pray for her.
May you be blessed for your loving service to the Vaisnavas.
Your Godsister, Phalini dd
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Oct 17, 2009 @ 2:16 am
Wow. What a wonderful story/article. Thank you so, so much, Subhangi Mataji, for sharing this experience with all of us. I wish to take the dust of your feet upon my unworthy head. Hare Krsna. All glories to Srila Prabhupada and to all the merciful Vaisnavas who are serious about saving the suffering souls of this world.
Your aspiring servant, Phalini devi dasi (ACBSP)
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Feb 18, 2008 @ 3:27 am
Dandavats. Hare Krsna. All glories to Srila Prabhupada and his faithful followers.
Thank you for writing such a nice note. We are glad to hear that the tests were negative.
Obeisances to your good husband, and affectionate greetings to your dear son Narada Muni.
Your old buddy,
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Oct 22, 2007 @ 4:29 am
Thank you, Mahadevi Mataji, for your good letters requesting help for Karnapura Prabhu and Mother Ragatmika. We appreciate so much that you took the time and care to write so nicely on their behalf. Hare Krsna.
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Oct 22, 2007 @ 4:43 am
In response to Cinmayi’s post #104:
Haribol, Cinmayi! Thanks for clarifying your previous post. First of all, I want to say that it was a pleasure hosting your daughter this summer for a weekend at my home. She is a lovely, graceful young lady.
Toward the end of your post you wrote, “… so what is all this talk about women have to be protected? its not happening. women are not being protected. it is not happening.
its just some talk on an internet website.”
My dear Godsister, I beg to differ. I have been protected for twenty-five years by my good, responsible, capable husband. I know dozens of devotee women who are following Srila Prabhupada’s instructions on how to be good dharma-patnis, and their sincere, good devotee husbands are also following Srila Prabhupada’s instructions as well by guiding, protecting, and providing for their wives and children. So how can you say that women are not being protected? Were you unaware that there are actually responsible men in our Movement who are diligently performing their duties as husbands and fathers, with the aim of pleasing Srila Prabhupada and Lord Krsna?
Hoping this meets you in good health,
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Dec 12, 2006 @ 11:17 am
Thank you for pointing out the potential problems that a dysfunctional relationship can be fraught with. My husband has never hit me in all the years of our marriage, so I have no direct experience of how traumatizing this can be, although I can just imagine. I see now that I didn’t think deeply enough about that before replying to your first comment. Being a soft-hearted Vaisnavi, it traumatizes me just to think of the pain of abused women.
Also, in the ten years we have lived in Prabhupada Village, I have only encountered one incident of a husband hitting his wife. So I am pretty green about this subject.
I consulted my husband about how to answer your posts. We read all the comments together, and we discussed them. He advised me that because I have not been in close company with abusive men and I am not really educated how to handle abusive situations, I am not actually qualified to address this subject. Srila Prabhupada said that devotee men should not beat their wives. It should just be understood that no one should be hitting Vaisnavis.
In my article, I was addressing devotees who are in functional marriages like my own.
My husband has counseled me to stick to what I have experience in, and that is really all I can do.
Thanks so much for conversing with me. Hare Krsna.
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Nov 5, 2006 @ 3:00 pm
Dear Subhadra priya,
Pranams. Hare Krsna. All glories to Srila Prabhupada and his sincere followers. Thank you for your encouraging note.
This is a very good idea you proposed: that older, successful grhasthas write about their experiences so that the newer couples can learn from them.
Here is the most important piece of advice I can give you: I strongly recommend that you study Srila Prabhupada’s teachings regarding the proper roles of husband and wife. My husband and I have both found invaluable gems in Srila Prabhupada’s books, lectures, and conversations that have continued to inspire us and guide us throughout our life together as aspiring Vaisnavas.
I wish you all happiness and success in your marriage and in your life! Haribol!
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Nov 2, 2006 @ 4:28 am
Thank you for your very piercing question, “Where do wife-beating and domestic violence, chronic problems in ISKCON, fit in?” It is very sad that these things do exist. What I advise my girlfriends who have problems dealing with their husbands is this: Do your best to be an ideal wife according to the examples given in the Bhagavatam, and pray, pray, pray for your husband that he can be blessed by the mercy of Lord Nityananda Prabhu.
Here are a few thoughts that rolled through my mind as I contemplated your question:
In regard to learning how to tame an unruly husband, there is an ancient Chinese story about a woman who tamed a tiger. Have you heard it? It is very instructive: Once a woman came to the hermitage of an old wise man. She complained that her husband had gone away to war, and ever since he returned, he had been nasty, cruel, and mean. She asked the old wise man what she should do. He replied, “Go and get a whisker from a tiger and bring it to me.” She proceeded to do just that.
One night, she crept out of her house with a bowl of meat. She approached a tiger who lived in a cave some distance from the village. She set the bowl of meat down on the ground several hundred yards from the mouth of the cave. She went back to her house and went to bed.
The next morning, she retrieved the empty bowl. That night, she again set out with the bowl filled with meat for the tiger. This time she set the bowl down closer to the tiger’s cave. She stood there for a moment looking toward the mouth of the cave. Then she left and spent the night in her house.
The next morning, she went to retrieve the bowl. Again, it was empty. The tiger was eating the meat, so she was encouraged. That night, she left the bowl of meat even closer to the tiger’s cave. Again and again she repeated her ritual, moving closer and closer every night to the mouth of the cave. At last, she placed the bowl right in front of the cave. The tiger came out and looked at her. He had grown accustomed to seeing her there and had come to feel indebted to her. He asked her, “Oh lady, what do you want?”
She replied, “Oh tiger, I want a whisker from your face.”
The tiger said, “All right, you may take a whisker.” She reached out, pulled a whisker from his face, turned quickly and ran, leaving the bowl of meat, never to return.
She ran all the way to the wise man’s hermitage. The old sage always kept a small sacrificial fire burning nearby as he meditated. She bowed down and waited, watching him meditate as the light of the fire danced on his wrinkled, old face. His meditation broke and he opened his eyes. “Oh, you have returned!”
“Yes, sir. I have brought you a whisker from a tiger.” She held out the whisker. The old man took it from her hand, and without a moment’s hesitation, immediately threw it into the fire.
She was surprised. “Why did you throw the whisker into the fire?” she gasped. She had worked so hard and exercised so much patience to get that whisker!
The sage replied, “If you can tame a tiger, then you can tame a man. Go now, and with the same patience and cleverness you used to tame the tiger, tame your husband.”
This story may or may not be true, but the moral of the proverb can be understood easily if one studies Srila Prabhupada’s books, especially the Srimad-Bhagavatam. Srila Prabhupada has given us wonderful stories and instructions from Vedic times–histories (which actually means they are true)–to guide us through life’s twists and turns. By reading the wonderful accounts of how noble ladies like Gandhari, Mandodari, and Sukanya behaved in the presence of their less-than-perfect husbands, we can get inspiration and guidance how to deal with our own situations. Consulting Srila Prabhupada’s teachings, which contain “personal letters” to his disciples on every page, can give us daily strength to handle the most difficult problems.
There is a great art how men and women can live together peacefully, and if we study Srila Prabhupada’s teachings regarding the proper behavior of married couples, and try very hard to always follow those instructions and teach our children to follow them, each generation of devotees will learn more about how to implement that art.
Still, there will naturally be problems because this is the material world, and the atmosphere of Kali-yuga is permeated with the urge to quarrel at the slightest provocation.
We also know that whatever sufferings we have undergone are due to our past misdeeds, and if we go on tolerating our difficulties, always remembering the Lord within the core of our hearts, we will “surely achieve liberation, for it has become our rightful claim.”
One consolation is that because we are trying to be devotees, Krsna is minimizing our miseries. I don’t know about you, but due to some horrendous sins in the past, in this life, I was born into a family that eats beef, and I committed many sins before coming to Krsna consciousness. Sometimes when I am struggling with a problem, I try to imagine how much torture I actually deserve, having been so very, very sinful not only in past lives but also in this lifetime! Krsna is so kind to reduce my sufferings, and if we stop and think, we can all appreciate how merciful He is to us, no matter how yucky things get in our life.
One more thought is that Srila Prabhupada said that it is not necessary for a woman to remain with a man who is fallen. He defines fallen as being attached to the four pillars of sinful life. But she should not go away from him and then marry again.
As long as a man is trying to become a devotee, though, that alone is reason to stay with him, keep tolerating his misbehavior, encouraging him, obeying him, and praying for his advancement!
Last thought is that nothing can really stop us from being Krsna conscious. There is no real excuse for forgetting Krsna, not even the excuse of a tiger-like husband. Granted, it can be very, very difficult if we are living with a man who has a mean temper, or who is lazy, or grumpy. But we can remember the wonderfully inspiring stories of great sadhvis found in the Bhagavatam, and find strength to continue on the path followed by the noblest of ladies: Srimati Radharani, Srimati Sita devi, Srimati Rukmini devi, Srimati Devaki devi, Srimati Jahnava devi, Srimati Subhadra devi, Srimati Gandhari devi, Srimati Kunti devi, Sukanya, Devahuti, Draupadi, Kausalya, Sumitra, Urmila, Mandodari, Satarupa, Barhismati, Aditi, Yasoda devi, Rohini devi, Parvati devi, thankfully the list goes on and on!
Thank you again for your tough question, and I hope this reply meets you in good health and inspired to carry on enthusiastically in the footsteps of the sadhvis!
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Nov 2, 2006 @ 4:10 am
Thank you, Suresh Prabhu, for your very honest and inspiring letter. You wrote, “…Since Lord Jagannath had combined us, how could we hope to please Him by breaking apart?” That is exactly our feeling. Naturally, married couples will disagree and sometimes fiery emotions will brew. But that urge to please our Lord, who did put us together, can be the rope that pulls us through the hardest of times, if we just hang on for dear life. My hubby and I always experience increased blessings when we make it through another of Maya’s trials, don’t you guys?
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Nov 2, 2006 @ 2:29 am
Thank you, Prabhu, for this very sweet remembrance of Srila Prabhupada. –Phalini dd
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Oct 27, 2006 @ 1:26 am
All glories to Srila Bhaktisvarupa Damodara Maharaja, the beloved spiritual son of Srila Prabhupada, and our dear Godbrother. We will miss his unbelievably sweet bhajans and his from-the-heart preaching. We are so proud of him for his work with the scientific community, and for spreading the rich Manipuri dance culture around the world. He left a sweet impression in our family’s memory–once when he was visiting our temple in Fullerton, California, he was sitting in our backyard taking prasadam. He looked over toward the house and asked, “Do you know you have a neem tree growing here?” We were so pleased to find out that there was a neem tree in our yard, and His Holiness Bhakti Svarup Damodar Maharaja revealed it to us! After that, when our son was born under that very neem tree, and whenever we used the bitter, medicinal leaves and berries of that tree or offered its beautiful flowers to our Deities, we always remembered Maharaja fondly for showing us that tree. He used to come to our house along with his Manipuri dancers back in the late 80’s, and it was always a pleasure hosting them. Our heartfelt condolences to all his disciples and beloved admirers. We honor him along with all of you at this time of your deep grief, and pray to Lord Krsna and Srila Prabhupada for your strength in continuing your Guru Maharaja’s great mission. Hare Krsna. Yours in the service of Srila Prabhupada,
Haripada dasa (ACBSP) and Phalini devi dasi (ACBSP)
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Oct 3, 2006 @ 3:12 pm
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Thank you, Hari Sauri Prabhu, for your well-written and sensitive report about Sujitendriya Prabhu and family. Our daughter Kamalini and our son-in-law Krsna Nam met them in Mayapur when they lived there last year. They told us the story this morning, and we were struck with disbelief at the intensity of suffering which the De’s and Sujitendriya Prabhu must be undergoing. We are sad and sorry for the sufferings of Sujitendriya Prabhu, his daughter Bhagirathi, and the wives of his deceased brothers, as well as for the grief of Srimati Gauri’s parents and brother and all the devotees of Mayapur who were close to these dear souls. Our heartfelt condolences go out to all the mourners of those who were lost in the flood, and we are remembering them in our prayers. Hare Krsna. Your servants, Haripada dasa (ACBSP) and Phalini devi dasi (ACBSP)
» Posted By Phalini devi dasi On Oct 4, 2006 @ 3:11 am
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