Once when I was distributing books in Great Yarmouth in 1990 I was having a fairly good day, at that time I was selling specifically 50 big and maha big books every day despite the conditions, the town, the weather etc
So this day was no exception even though it was raining all day and the people were hard as nails lol I was on course to distribute my 50. So through the course of the day there was this young lad who kept popping up and shouting at me and disrupting my exchanges with various people. He even got to the point where he was snatching books out of people’s hands and throwing them back at me . For most of the day I was tolerating this and trying my best to just ignore him and let it be.
And as the day drew to a close and there were hardly any people left on the street, i had sold 49 books. The pressure was on. Of course I wanted to remain steady and sell that 50th book, I was probably starting to get very fruitive and attached and this no doubt was affecting my consciousness in a negative way and the people could feel that. Plus I knew that any minute now the team leader of the travelling party was going to turn up from another town with the van and say ok time up lets go prabhus. So I was running against the clock fighting with my ego and generally getting a bit passionate and less tolerant lol as you do as a young celibate monk on a do or die mission 🙂
I was running all over the shop trying to engage the last few souls rushing through the precinct trying to avoid the rain and get home. It was not easy and I only wanted to sell that last book, that 50th book to uphold my steadiness and reputation 🙂 And guess what ?? Lo and behold that young guy suddenly reappeared and came straight to me and again started his mission to disrupt the book distribution. But the problem is by now I am so deeply in the realms of attachment and fervour , that I am no longer able to be the tolerant monk I had been all day , and this guy was a really bad vibe lol : So, unfortunately, I was unable to control my young passionate mind and with out even realizing I grabbed the young man by the scruff of his collar and dragged him behind the Boots Pharmacy into their staff car park, threw him against the wall and shouted ..mate what is your problem?? You want some trouble or what ?? Of course I was well out of order and out of control and I dont advocate this kind of behaviour on sankirtan , but I was a young lad and it was what it was, a moment of passion.
Any way we looked at each other and then the young lad broke down into tears and started to explain his problem with drugs and that his life was in a bad place and that he just wanted to take it out on someone which meant me the Hare Krsna in his town, he apologised a lot and of course so did I we embraced each other and shook hands and then he said I will take one of your books, and of course i only had one book left the 50th book !! so he bought that from me and walked off and I was left feeling devastated at my behavior and feeling really bad. And then I realised that all day long this guy was harassing me and little did we know that last book I was so intent on selling was actually his book. Lesson I learnt was ? Dont judge any one when sharing Krsna with others , because you just dont know who they are or what Krsna has in store for them Hare Krsna. I was humbled and it wouldnt be the last time ha ha ha Hare Krsna